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Ahh im so confused. Boys. teh! (1 Viewer)

MzbLaZeIT

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Ok about two weeks ago, my boyfriend and i of 8 months, broke up.
It started out i broke up with him on new years, because we are too different and want different things, the relationship was pointless because it wasnt going to go anywhere
Anyway, it was hard being apart coz we liked eachother so much, so we got back together... Then about two weeks ago, it was my turn to get dumped
mind you, it was through an sms. (lol pathetic)
we exchanged a few sms' along the lines of
me: and you are so pathetic you had to say it to sms, u couldnt say it to my face?
him: yeah bla bla bla its not gonna work out
me : ok then, piss off nice knwing u
him: you jst died out for me

whether it was revenge for me putting it over him first. i dont care.. because i DONT want to get back with him, i DO like him + still think about him, but its all for the best. It truly is

i recently walked past his work (and i think i was still a bit cut) i didnt give him the time of day, his boss saw me and got the attention of him, he looked, but i had blank expressions, i didnt want to give him the satisfaction

anyway a few days later, he contacts me and asks if im happy, i said about?
he said me and you? i go it was your decision to make it like this, and he was telling me that his all confused now and thinks about it all the time bla bla bla... i left the conversation open for him to explain himself + still didnt give him credit. that is the last time i spoke to him.

now that the situation has cooled down i just want to write a letter, to tell him how i felt in the relationship, explain things i felt, noticed, didnt like etc.... jst to "get some closure" for both of us.
i mean, if i see him on the street in a couple years to come, i dont wanna ignore the guy.. i did have feelings for him..
but then i think of the times he treated me like shit, sms me to dump me.. all that bullshit.. and i dont think he deserves it?
all my friends rekon leave it, because i knew it was going no1 where.. so why even make effort to write a letter?

:burn:
 

MzbLaZeIT

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Schroedinger said:
Write the letter.

But actually punctuate it properly, and y'know, use english.

That should help far better than 'lol u wer a fag'

hahaah yeah definately.
i want to look smart n all :D
 

tres bien

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Does it have to be in a letter? Can't you just prepare it beforehand, meet up with him, then say it to his face? My friend once wrote a letter to a friend about how she felt about him and stuff, and he didn't respond to her about it, until she had to ask him via sms if he actually read it, and he said he did, and said he didn't want to start a relationship because he wasn't ready. Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is, it gave him power and evidence that she really likes him, and kind of allows him to be manipulative if he wants. She's over him now though. If she told me before hand that she wants to write a letter, I would have told her not to.

Even though yours is getting closure, I don't think you should put anything in writing, in case you want to deny something later and he'd be like "nuh-uh here's the letter blah blah". Saying it to him is more confronting.
 

alby

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to get personal closure, you could still write the letter, but just not send it to him. you don't have to do his dirty work for him, he's able to get his own closure when and however he wants.

put simply, it's over, get your closure, free yourself, and enjoy life
 

alby

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Schroedinger said:
Yeah.

Write the letter then put it in an envelope with a stamp.

And give it so someone you can trust to mail it in the next six months, but not before three months.

Or something.
there's nothing to say that writing a letter requires sending it. writing the letter is just a good way to get all your feelings out without immediately being criticised (or feeling like you are) for what you have to say or later regretting saying or not saying something.

she doesnt have an obligation to give it to him, it's only if SHE wants to. and giving it to him later on makes it irrelevant and may bring up the issue again, which neither of them may want so far down the track
 

withoutaface

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Was this the same ex you met up with for no strings attached sex? If so HAHAHAHAHAHA you retard you got attached.
 

MzbLaZeIT

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alby said:
to get personal closure, you could still write the letter, but just not send it to him. you don't have to do his dirty work for him, he's able to get his own closure when and however he wants.

put simply, it's over, get your closure, free yourself, and enjoy life
at the moment i have the letter written, but havent sent it yet
and i feel pretty good about writing it atleast.
i dont want him to think im crawling up his ass, because im not! i jst want peace, incase something bad happens lol
 

MzbLaZeIT

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withoutaface said:
Was this the same ex you met up with for no strings attached sex? If so HAHAHAHAHAHA you retard you got attached.
ummm sorry to burst your bubble but thats not him, i do meet up with that ex though even now and then, its strictly for hook ups, i dont even like him.

this boyfriend im talking about now, is my most recent, to which i admit i did cheat on a couple of times, bad i know.. but i knew in the back of my mind it wasnt going to work out, so thats most probably why i did cheat on him, then until he dumped me, i didnt realise how much i did like him!
hence, i want to write the letter jst to stay friends with him atleast.
 

grk_styl

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i went through a similar situation. we left it hanging for over a year, then I called him to talk and get closure. He refused to give me closure, so I had to some how get it without him (easier said than done). I think you need to be weary of this and also remember to think about yourself in this situation and not him (sounds selfish, I know).

Alby is right. Writing the letter (whether u give it or not) will help you close it. Alternaitvely you could talk to him about it. But it depends on what he's like with talking (ie. does he close up? not tell you how he;'s feeling? etc)
 
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firstly: shotgun having mzblazeit next she is ace

secondly, if you want to pour your emotions out on how you feel its upto you; im a stubborn person so i wouldnt by nature anyway
 

Serius

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Casmira said:
firstly: shotgun having mzblazeit next she is ace

secondly, if you want to pour your emotions out on how you feel its upto you; im a stubborn person so i wouldnt by nature anyway
i know eh she is the perfect girl, cheats on you and everything! roawr let me at her!

so mzblazeit, why do u care? i beleive he officially served you. He did to you want girls normally do to us. why? well he probably found out about the cheating and realised the best way to hurt you was emotionally so he staged thi whole ellaborate scheme so that he could break up with you, not the other way around

far fetched? yeah but still possible
 

azzie

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we had a relationship worshop at school one time because my grade was a bit bitchy haha
basically write the letter to him. make it as long as you can. write about everything you feel about him, the good and the bad, and what you want. dont send it to him. keep it though, if you feel you need to read it, do.
when you're over it, when you've read it too many times and you're sick of it, burn it or destroy it. its EXCELLENT closure.
 

withoutaface

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Casmira said:
firstly: shotgun having mzblazeit next she is ace

secondly, if you want to pour your emotions out on how you feel its upto you; im a stubborn person so i wouldnt by nature anyway
1. She's ugly.
2. She cheats.
3. She's not over her ex.
d. She can't distinguish between letters and numbers.
 

Ranger Stacie

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im jumping on the 'writing the letter for closure' bandwagon, i've written every single ex, or guy whose fucked me around letters without sending them and it really does help. I've kept all the letters dating back from year 9 as well and it is good to look at them and see how much you have changed as well.

im weird i know
 
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withoutaface said:
1. She's ugly.
2. She cheats.
3. She's not over her ex.
d. She can't distinguish between letters and numbers.
1. shes actually good looking, you should see a proper photo of her
2. ouch D:
3. that shouldnt be a problem when i step in
d. we're not all as smart as you waf
 

alby

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Ranger Stacie said:
im weird i know
nope, it's the same as diaries - just letting you get whatever you want out (pos or neg).

personally i think writing is the best way to get your emotions out.
 

Smurg

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alby said:
nope, it's the same as diaries - just letting you get whatever you want out (pos or neg).

personally i think writing is the best way to get your emotions out.
That, or a punching bag.

So I think writing on a punching bag is the best way to go.
 

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