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Belonging writing task standard english (1 Viewer)

kijun22

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2009
Write a story on the concept of belonging for a teenage megazine. Use One of the following as a basis for your story:
a) there is nothing better than to know you belong

I chose a and i want you to give me a feedback ASAP before today. And i'm shit in English so yeh Thanks

[FONT=&quot]“There is nothing better than to know you belong”[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]The teen mag. April 2009 issue. This week’s Show Me What You Got is a short story by Kj from NSW Australia. He wrote a short story about a topic – There’s nothing better than to know that you belong. This article illustrates to us the nature of belonging in our everyday life, where being apart of something is only a part of the larger spectrum. Belonging is shown here as a basic human need and this is true; we all need to a part of group, association or a particular thing on an everyday basis. [/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]His nervousness had got a hold of him tight around his body. He felt as if he was stran[/FONT][FONT=&quot]gl[/FONT][FONT=&quot]ed with a gigantic belt that was wrapped around his body and slowly getting tighter and tighter. It was the day when he starts his new school. Every step he takes closer to the door of the school’s office he felt smaller and smaller, powerless and [/FONT][FONT=&quot]all alone[/FONT][FONT=&quot]. He never had seen a school that was so big and had more than [/FONT][FONT=&quot]two thousand[/FONT][FONT=&quot] students in a school. He wanted to start fresh at his new school[/FONT][FONT=&quot], welcomed. He took a deep breathe and went inside only to find out that he now has somewhere that he belong[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]He never got along with anybody at his previous school; he was always alone[/FONT][FONT=&quot], always trying to avoid contact with people by [/FONT][FONT=&quot]finding different places around the school campus where there wasn’t anyone around. Everyday he was abused, punched, mocked in front of everyone[/FONT][FONT=&quot],[/FONT][FONT=&quot] in the grade[/FONT][FONT=&quot].[/FONT][FONT=&quot] [/FONT][FONT=&quot]T[/FONT][FONT=&quot]he T’s[/FONT][FONT=&quot];[/FONT][FONT=&quot] which was the most popular group in the school you should never mess with[/FONT][FONT=&quot] and they had a list of the people who were called losers[/FONT][FONT=&quot] and[/FONT][FONT=&quot] Tom was in it. They[/FONT][FONT=&quot] always had plan[/FONT][FONT=&quot]s[/FONT][FONT=&quot] for him. The what-to-do list was just endless that they had a calendar in their lockers to remind them what their schedules were for him.[/FONT][FONT=&quot] He knew that he never was a part of them and at any stage never tried to fit in with them. He was sick of his life rotting away in that school with them.[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]Every attention that was given to him made him feel uneasy and uncomfortable[/FONT][FONT=&quot]. E[/FONT][FONT=&quot]very step [/FONT][FONT=&quot]that he could hear [/FONT][FONT=&quot]walking towards him and[/FONT][FONT=&quot] passing[/FONT][FONT=&quot] by him felt like [/FONT][FONT=&quot]a prisoner locked out from the world, on constant watch just waiting for his trials to proceed[/FONT][FONT=&quot]. [/FONT][FONT=&quot]Even the[/FONT][FONT=&quot] sound of [/FONT][FONT=&quot]paper [/FONT][FONT=&quot]scrunching up reminded of the times [/FONT][FONT=&quot]back in the old school. Almost every action that others around him do, he felt like he was the earth, drawing every distasteful attention and at the same time thinking at the speed of light about what would happen next. It was almost as if his body was perfectly adapted to his old school’s routines.[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]He got his locker combinations from the office and started to head to where the lockers were, remembering the directions given by the administration officer. His heart started to beat faster and faster and palms sweating even more as he got closer and closer to the locker room. It wasn’t a locker room like what he wanted it to be; in an actual room of lockers, the lockers were aligned along the breezeway against on the classroom, left and right which continued to a point where he couldn’t clearly see if he hadn’t had his glasses on. He could almost visualize himself being isolated, in the middle of the hallway all alone, bullied or not the feeling of isolation was never nice.[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]“Hi, what’s your name?” a voice whispered as he placed his books into his locker. “Tom and you are?” “Oh right, I forgot to introduce myself, I’m Phillip” he continued “You must be new around here hey? Do you want me to show you around the school and introduce you to my friends? He asked in a polite manner. For a second Tom felt included in the school and it’s communities. He made no hesitations and quickly gave an answer before Phillip would think that he doesn’t want to talk to him and walk away. [/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]Philip introduced Tom to the rest of the group. “Hi, Lisa”, “Edward here”, “Hey how’re you doing, my name is Jacob”, “Suzy”. After going off to class, He was introduced to the class which is a normal routine for new students in most schools and sat down. Philip had the same classes as Tom and sat next to each other. They began to have a conversation and they knew each other better now and found out that he and the people around them have a lot of things in common. He realized that he feels less restricted and feels much better to know that he has someone now who he can attach to, slow loosening the gigantic belt that wrapped around him for long[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]He sat in the middle of the class next to Phillip. He felt something special about sitting down in the middle of the class with other people seated around him. Tom always used to sit on the corners and the outer seats or the only available seats left after coming in to the class late. Tom Mclean wasn’t the old loser, Tom Mclean. He is the new Tom Mclean, included; associate a member and part of a group united with different people through commonality. The long search for belonging is now over and there is nothing better than to know you belong.[/FONT]
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[FONT=&quot]Short story by Kj from NSW Australia. He shows that Belongins is a basic human need and is ongoing everyday. And the nature of belonging how being apart of something is only a part of a larger spectrum.[/FONT]
 

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