My mind is boggling slightly from the reading I've done today, but take this for now:
I advise you to underline the key words in all your essay questions. In this case, it's :In your presentation, explore HOW and for WHAT PURPOSE composers create their particular visions and versions. ("HOW" and "WHY", effectively)
You also need to clean up your structure. Please! Typing sentences like this is not fun. It is hard to read. When you bring up points they look disjointed. Because there is no flow. And that makes it hard to read.
Otherwise rephrased as: Typing sentences like the above is not fun because it is hard to read - singular points closed off by over-use of the full stop (otherwise known as "dot-points-in-an-essay") creates the appearance of disjointedness. Combined with the lack of strong, clear flow, it is difficult to read.
Will give a mark when I read it over properly (which should be soon). The content looks pretty good, but the stucture of your sentences detracts from what you're actually saying. Clean it up, make it easy and enjoyable to read, and the markers will love it.
