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panicatthehsc

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Hey guys!

For my AOS essay I have to look at The Tempest. I'm a bit confused about how to set out the ideas in my body paragraphs. I'm not 100% sure how to describe my question, but I'll take the example of one of the ideas in The Tempest.

So - if I was to write a body paragraph about the way that discovering something for the first time can change people's perceptions of themselves and others, could I choose to write about Miranda's discovery of love for the first time and just elaborate on that throughout the paragraph or would I choose several different examples - Miranda and love, Caliban's humanity, Prospero and revenge...?

I'm really struggling to get some strong detailed points on the text so any help would be much appreciated.
 

Erique

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Hey guys!

For my AOS essay I have to look at The Tempest. I'm a bit confused about how to set out the ideas in my body paragraphs. I'm not 100% sure how to describe my question, but I'll take the example of one of the ideas in The Tempest.

So - if I was to write a body paragraph about the way that discovering something for the first time can change people's perceptions of themselves and others, could I choose to write about Miranda's discovery of love for the first time and just elaborate on that throughout the paragraph or would I choose several different examples - Miranda and love, Caliban's humanity, Prospero and revenge...?

I'm really struggling to get some strong detailed points on the text so any help would be much appreciated.
I would personally unite a variety of ideas under one thematic topic sentence. While focusing on that one point could provide excellent depth, several different examples tells the marker that you have a sound, as well as holistic understanding of the text. This is what I did for Hamlet, granted that I was not jumping back and forth between characters each sentence, but connecting these instances as one usually would - e.g "furthermore", "in tandem", "congruently", to show where that same idea permeates other areas of your text, not to mention that the whole purpose of my Hamlet essay was to prove textual integrity. Therefore, the same could apply in any essay where you must convey complex and well-rounded ideas.

Since I'm not a 2015 student, I cannot give you much assistance on collating "strong detailed points", but including a wide range of ideas is surely a good place to start.
 

strawberrye

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I would personally unite a variety of ideas under one thematic topic sentence. While focusing on that one point could provide excellent depth, several different examples tells the marker that you have a sound, as well as holistic understanding of the text. This is what I did for Hamlet, granted that I was not jumping back and forth between characters each sentence, but connecting these instances as one usually would - e.g "furthermore", "in tandem", "congruently", to show where that same idea permeates other areas of your text, not to mention that the whole purpose of my Hamlet essay was to prove textual integrity. Therefore, the same could apply in any essay where you must convey complex and well-rounded ideas.

Since I'm not a 2015 student, I cannot give you much assistance on collating "strong detailed points", but including a wide range of ideas is surely a good place to start.
I would agree with using connecting phrases, but I would disagree with the bolded part, because at the heart of any good essay is a firm quest to answer the given essay question and nothing but the given essay question, the marking criteria will always not focused on the breadth of knowledge you have about a particular text, but rather the depth of your knowledge on a text in an selective area of the discover rubric. Hence it is better to do in depth analysis rather than trying to cover the whole book in one paragraph, particularly if your ideas are not strongly connected.
 

Erique

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I would agree with using connecting phrases, but I would disagree with the bolded part, because at the heart of any good essay is a firm quest to answer the given essay question and nothing but the given essay question, the marking criteria will always not focused on the breadth of knowledge you have about a particular text, but rather the depth of your knowledge on a text in an selective area of the discover rubric. Hence it is better to do in depth analysis rather than trying to cover the whole book in one paragraph, particularly if your ideas are not strongly connected.
You're right. "Wide range of ideas" wasn't the most accurate phrase, but of course you shouldn't include material that's impertinent to the question or the paragraph itself (the argument of which would draw in these diverse ideas that exemplify that selective area of the rubric).
 

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