Oh I don't know, you'll have to ask them. When it was 2007 or so I was apparently making fake emails and now apparently it's encompassed actual stalking and threats of violence.
Those teenage girls - their logic and reasoning skills are negligible and essentially zero.
Seriously, you'd think: "Okay, so apparently I'm stalking you. I don't think that's true, let's talk through your concerns" would be enough to off-put them, so they could sit down and have a decent conversation and debate it with me. But no, as soon as I breached the ten metre or so barrier: "OMG, YOU'RE THE STALKER! GET AWAY!"
Unfortunately, amidst all that blubbering mass of stupidity, insolence and incomprehensible jibberish commonly attributed to teenage girls, is - what I believe to be - my soulmate.
It's a plot that would totally fit an Academy Award Best Picture movie, you know? Whether success or failure on my part.
EDIT: The movie, would go like this...
Now just with a bit of background - we'll call the paranoid and incomprehensible leader of the anti-Shadowdude establishment 'C.' and my soulmate, 'S.'
Okay, so in the movie - I'll go to university and one of my friends ends up working for FC Porto - which has had a shocker in the Portugese Liga and has fallen into relegation. Anyway, for some reason, he calls upon me to coach the team - now obviously I don't have the UEFA Pro Licence needed and so FC Porto and UEFA reach an agreement where I can coach, while concurrently completing my UEFA licence. So after I finish my Science degree, I go over to Portugal and learn the language. After my first season, I bring FC Porto back into the Liga and in my second season, bring them agonisingly close to Portugese Liga victory - getting 2nd place to Benfica.
Meanwhile, C. and S. are back happily in Australia and C. has ended up getting a boyfriend and S. is still single. In my third season, I take the Champions League spot (as I am in second place) and bring the club to the semi-finals where I face Red Bull Salzburg. I lose the first leg 4-0 and then in the second leg, am leading 5-0 at the Dragao before a late goal by them makes us win 5-1 and lose out on away goals. However, victory would eventually come to us via the Cup and League.
In my fourth season - and I am now 24 - as a now famous Australian in football circles, I return to Australia with FC Porto in a few matches against A-League clubs to form a partnership between the A-League and the Portugese Liga. Secretly, I use my spare time to find S. - and eventually track her down. I go up to her house and am met by her parents, and we exchange pleasantries - and I offer them tickets to FC Porto v Sydney FC at ANZ Stadium (or whatever it is called then) along with S. and her felow siblings that night, giving them tickets to a skybox or whatever it's called.
That night, after I defeat Sydney FC 6-0 - I go and meet S. and we start going out. Then, the paranoid C. comes in and starts dissuading her from dating me because of the reasons above. Eventually, S. decides to stay in Australia for now and I go back to Porto to begin my fourth season (as the above was done during the summer break in Europe).
During the December-January break, the bond between S. and I is so strong that she decides to move to Portugal with me - infuriating C. Anyway, a few months later - C. gets a new boyfriend and of course, she being ignorant, she doesn't know who I am. The boyfriend is an FC Porto fan and C. gets infuriated when the boyfriend wakes her up at 4 in the morning to watch the Champions League final between FC Porto and Manchester United - and even more so when she sees myself in the managers box (though she's more confused) with S.
I win the Champions League defeating Manchester United on penalties with my goalkeeper Helton and striker Helder Postiga retiring, with Postiga netting the winning penalty. I trade in Oscar Ustari from Argentina and Bojan Krkic from Barcelona to lead my front line with Quaresma and Leandro Lima - in a 4-3-3 formation.
In the last scene, FC Porto's players parade around the ground with the Champions League trophy, while S. and I go to the centre circle - the rain begins to pour, the crowd behind is fully celebrating as the Dragao is the venue and FC Porto win 'at home', and a lucky photographer from Spain happens to capture the shot of me proposing to S. - with the rain falling, and the players out of focus in the background and the crowd going wild.
The Champions League Anthem plays - and the movie finishes.
Also, the majority of the Champions League fixtures and Portugese League things I said may or may not have been directly taken from my exploits in FIFA 08 Manager Mode with FC Porto... =P
