Are all Korean guys chauvinist? (1 Viewer)

[kidokkyo]

I'm a Korean girl, and it seems that almost all the Korean guys I meet are chauvinist to some extent. Especially if they're older than me, they always, ALWAYS do the whole "I'm your Oppa" charade. Which really annoys me because they think that having been born an hour or two before you means they have to be respected, and they never seem to think about how they can merit deep and lasting respect.

Whether they were born in Korea and how long they've lived outside of Korea doesn't really seem to have an effect on this male arrogance. The roots of this arrogance are clearly traceable to Korea's Confucian history, and it seems that it just keeps getting passed on down the generations. I've met more than a few guys who can't even speak Korean, but their mannerisms and their attitudes are so clearly influenced by Korean Confucian culture.

Do I just need to meet more Korean guys? By the way, don't get me wrong: I'm not trying to hate on Korean guys; most of them are lots of fun, and hardly any of them are trying to offend anyone. It's just that my personal experience with them and with the Korean culture both in the Republic of Korea and in the South Korean diaspora has led me to a few conclusions, and I wanted to hear some other opinions. I'm particularly interested in what other Korean girls (especially 1.5, 2nd generation girls) have to say, but of course anyone is welcome to pitch in. Including Korean guys.

And if you think that a Korean guy is not a good match for an Korean girl living in Australia (banana, not fob), then which other cultural backgrounds would you recommend?

 

[LonelyWolf]

DGVFDHBFGHBFGBN HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

[Mature Lamb]

Have you considered dating non-Koreans?

 

[hayabusaboston]

It is something that appears in every culture, in your case most probably by coincidence you are surrounded by many korean guys who happen to be a bit chauvinistic. You don't need to fret over it, it will happen anywhere, not just in korea.
In certain religions though, chauvinism is promoted. Korea most probably doesnt abound with those religions.

On a side note, why is it EVERY FREAKING SUSHI PLACE I GO TO IN AUSTRALIA, the waitresses are KOREAN. Sushi is Japanese. I start to order in Japanese, then the lady is like "Um, im korean". In EVERY sushi place. What is with that...?

But anyway kidokkyo a good match for you would MOST probably be of asian descent, but if another guy feels to be the right one go for him.

 

[kidokkyo]

Have you considered dating non-Koreans?

Absolutely! Although a lot of the time I express myself best in Korean, so yeah. I'm in a bit of a fix. Maybe I need a non-Korean who speaks fluent Korean.

 

[kidokkyo]

DGVFDHBFGHBFGBN HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

……… 오랜만입니다, lonelywolf님.
i wonder … are you trying to prove my point?

 

[OzKo]

It is something that appears in every culture, in your case most probably by coincidence you are surrounded by many korean guys who happen to be a bit chauvinistic. You don't need to fret over it, it will happen anywhere, not just in korea.
In certain religions though, chauvinism is promoted. Korea most probably doesnt abound with those religions.

On a side note, why is it EVERY FREAKING SUSHI PLACE I GO TO IN AUSTRALIA, the waitresses are KOREAN. Sushi is Japanese. I start to order in Japanese, then the lady is like "Um, im korean". In EVERY sushi place. What is with that...?

But anyway kidokkyo a good match for you would MOST probably be of asian descent, but if another guy feels to be the right one go for him.

Because, the Japanese community in Australia is very small compared to the Korean community and the diaspora is more concentrated. Koreans see an opportunity to make money as Japanese food is arguably more marketable to the general public. There are some authentic Japanese places (e.g. The Nippon Club near the Supreme Court) but you will struggle in many areas of Sydney.

To OP:

I think you've pretty much explained the reason in your post. Gender roles in Korea are quite defined and that's cultivated itself in attitudes between men and women. Personally, I see that dying out as 2nd gens+ have their own kids. Remember that the Korean community in Australia only started to really bloom into what it is during the '90s.

As I guy, I didn't notice it when I go to Korea nor have I really noticed it here in Sydney (I've grown up in quite a Korean area). Mind you, I don't really hang out with many Koreans in the first place so this could be why. Regardless, I know that quite a few Koreans dislike the traditional stance of our culture so they shy away from those attitudes. I suppose keep trying as there are always well-balanced people out there.

 

[kidokkyo]

It is something that appears in every culture, in your case most probably by coincidence you are surrounded by many korean guys who happen to be a bit chauvinistic. You don't need to fret over it, it will happen anywhere, not just in korea.
In certain religions though, chauvinism is promoted. Korea most probably doesnt abound with those religions.

Thanks for your perspective! You're right, I haven't really had as much contact with other cultures, so I can't really compare the Korean culture to anything else. But if we speak in broader terms (i.e. culture, and not just religion): I've done a lot of reading on the impact of Korea's Confucian heritage (and Confucianism includes religious elements: e.g. ancestor worship) on contemporary Koreans, and I have to say that chauvinism is promoted in Korea.

On a side note, why is it EVERY FREAKING SUSHI PLACE I GO TO IN AUSTRALIA, the waitresses are KOREAN. Sushi is Japanese. I start to order in Japanese, then the lady is like "Um, im korean". In EVERY sushi place. What is with that...?

Hahaha … but this is Australia, right? Wouldn't you order in English? Sorry these Koreans are taking away from your experience of authentic Japanese cuisine! On a side note of my own, I get really annoyed when I go to Korean-owned businesses and they don't speak functional English. I mean, I can understand that not everyone has the opportunity to learn English, but it doesn't mean that it's not annoying.

But anyway kidokkyo a good match for you would MOST probably be of asian descent, but if another guy feels to be the right one go for him.

Good advice. Ta.

 

[hayabusaboston]

Thanks for your perspective! You're right, I haven't really had as much contact with other cultures, so I can't really compare the Korean culture to anything else. But if we speak in broader terms (i.e. culture, and not just religion): I've done a lot of reading on the impact of Korea's Confucian heritage (and Confucianism includes religious elements: e.g. ancestor worship) on contemporary Koreans, and I have to say that chauvinism is promoted in Korea.



Hahaha … but this is Australia, right? Wouldn't you order in English? Sorry these Koreans are taking away from your experience of authentic Japanese cuisine! On a side note of my own, I get really annoyed when I go to Korean-owned businesses and they don't speak functional English. I mean, I can understand that not everyone has the opportunity to learn English, but it doesn't mean that it's not annoying.



Good advice. Ta.

Yea its in Australia. I dont order in english because I enjoy speaking japanese, and I always love ordering sushi in Japanese. When I was in Japan its easy. But here its just "Sorry, im korean". @ Ozko, I know Koreans see Japanese food as a money making opportunity, but come on, there are sooo many other races and i just find it confusing how koreans just happen to be the one country dominating sushi industry in australia? Like in australia there could be an aussie, indian, chinese, europeans of all sorts, but its JUST Koreans pretty much. Which is interesting actually. How they've come to dominate.

Im not Japanese myself, European actually. But learnt Japanese since a young age, so love speaking in it

But for HSC have slightly lost fluency, due to lots of competitions and studying. So I dont get to talk to many Japanese people.

 

[OzKo]

Yea its in Australia. I dont order in english because I enjoy speaking japanese, and I always love ordering sushi in Japanese. When I was in Japan its easy. But here its just "Sorry, im korean". @ Ozko, I know Koreans see Japanese food as a money making opportunity, but come on, there are sooo many other races and i just find it confusing how koreans just happen to be the one country dominating sushi industry in australia? Like in australia there could be an aussie, indian, chinese, europeans of all sorts, but its JUST Koreans pretty much. Which is interesting actually. How they've come to dominate.

Im not Japanese myself, European actually. But learnt Japanese since a young age, so love speaking in it

But for HSC have slightly lost fluency, due to lots of competitions and studying. So I dont get to talk to many Japanese people.

Some parts of the Korean cuisine are interchangeable with Japanese cuisine in a loose sense as many ingredients and some tastes are similar. Not too sure why the Koreans got into it more than the Chinese but you got places like Mizuya which I'm sure are Chinese run.

 

[hayabusaboston]

Some parts of the Korean cuisine are interchangeable with Japanese cuisine in a loose sense as many ingredients and some tastes are similar. Not too sure why the Koreans got into it more than the Chinese but you got places like Mizuya which I'm sure are Chinese run.

Oh there's a place near chinatown, near the new "City Central" hotel or something, it's like a small region carved out of the wall of a building, with a Japanese restaurant on your left, chinese in the middle and some newsagency on the right. The chinese place has THE FREAKING BEST DUMPLINGS EVER OMG!!!! With chilli sauce wow its like the best thing ever!!!

 

[study-freak]

Yeah most Korean guys are like that. 2 years ago, I went to USYD O-week and lol, one of the Korean societies there at the time had this t-shirt with "오빠라불러줘" on the back... I'm a male myself but I was like "ewww...." and decided not to join any Korean societies from then on.

It's indeed about hierarchy but I think "오빠" represents something more than that lol. Sense of superiority + sexual attraction to some extent, imo...

 

[Mature Lamb]

show pics and i'll consider dating you

 

[Arcorn]

In answer to the original question in this thread. Yes.

 

[ohexploitable]

corians

 

[LonelyWolf]

……… 오랜만입니다, lonelywolf님.
i wonder … are you trying to prove my point?

what?

 

[kidokkyo]

what?

never mind. i beg your pardon.

 

[kidokkyo]

show pics and i'll consider dating you

That's generous of you to offer your conditional consideration, but no thanks.

I'm not actually looking for a relationship; just interested in Korean culture.

 

[kidokkyo]

Yeah most Korean guys are like that. 2 years ago, I went to USYD O-week and lol, one of the Korean societies there at the time had this t-shirt with "오빠라불러줘" on the back... I'm a male myself but I was like "ewww...." and decided not to join any Korean societies from then on.

Hahahahahaha … are you serious? Wow, what a turn-off. Call me anal retentive, but it's not even funny. I mean, anyone else is of course free to find it funny, but I reserve the right to find it creepy. LoL yeah I've never joined an on-campus Korean society. But don't unis in Sydney have Korean societies for 1.5 and 2nd+ generation Koreans? Maybe at UNSW?

It's indeed about hierarchy but I think "오빠" represents something more than that lol. Sense of superiority + sexual attraction to some extent, imo...

SO true.

I thnk it relates to the whole girls calling their boyfriends "오빠" thing. I'm pretty sure that even just ten years ago, people didn't do that. And if they did, it didn't hold the same connotations and nuances that it does now. WTF happened. Anyway yeah, I'd probably be a whole lot less uptight about calling guys "오빠" if the contemporary culture was different.

I want a t-shirt that says ⋆나에게는 오빠가 없다⋆

 

[Shadowdude]

Oi guys, stop with the Korean and tell us what that stuff means.