My mum won't let me drop and I didn't hand in the first assessment. (1 Viewer)

[ShadowLighte]

So I'm kinda screwed. Haha, kinda. So I was meant to drop CAFS a long time ago but my mum was reluctant to allow it. Anyway, I had the first major assessment/ project which I kinda stuffed up already last year. By that time I had already wanted to drop the subject and had talked to my friends about it and stuff.

I left the project that was to be done during the holidays and was due at the beginning of March. I went back to school and was still iffy about dropping it but was more on the yes than the no. My mum knew about it by this time and didn't want me to, reminding me about the risks of flunking a subject though I was certain I wouldn't. This went dragged on because I am so damn indecisive and keep thinking the what if's and any other solution. Also, I can't really talk to my mum because she tends to end up shouting at me and criticising me and whatever she says is right forever so y'know, perfectly civil. I have social anxiety so it's hard talking to anyone though I managed to get the courage to get a subject change form from my year advisor.

I went through it and over the next month I managed to get my teacher's signature much to her displeasure and head teacher's signature. Now only for my mum's and then principal's. I couldn't talk to her about this. Every morning and afternoon I took the form in my hand and willed myself to ask her but ended up pacing around and just couldn't. So I left it for her to see on the half of the dining table used to put newspapers and letters and whatnot. She did see it and questioned me about it and at the time, she wasn't angry or anything. She just made sure that I hadn't handed it in yet or dropped it yet. I told her that I hadn't but really wanted to and listed my reasons and she didn't respond. that was last month.

Since then, my teacher's been nagging me every lesson to get it signed by the principal and has asked me if I wanted to go during class to see him and it's like she wants me gone :/ I've been doing other work in her class so meh, maybe that's why. Thing is, I have my half yearlies and there is no weighting for the CAFS half yearly. Just today we had an argument and she will not let me drop it. She doesn't know that I didn't hand in the project. I asked my teacher in fear a little while ago when she joked about it and she said she wouldn't send a letter home because she knows I'm going to drop it.

What now? She doesn't believe in scaling when I told her that it scales badly and she told me she was to ask the school about it and told me not to listen to what my peers say and asked why I'd even contemplated doing the course if the scaling was so bad to start with, calling me an idiot and wasting my time but I didn't even know about scaling and whatnot when I was choosing my subjects. She made the point that I could flunk maths and get 60% but do well in CAFS and get 90 though it might scale to 70% which would still be better though I said that wouldn't happen because of my dislike for the course.

I don't know what to do. It's kind of humiliating going back to class and letting it be known to my teacher and classmates that I'm not dropping after everything + failing the first assessment. My mum will skin me alive if she finds out about the incompletion of the first assessment.

 

[iStudent]

I think you should be honest and just tell her about your first assessment instead of hiding it and lying to yourself.
(she might skin you alive but hey, she's going to know anyways so it's best that she knows sooner rather than later)

 

[bongoli]

Are you doing the HSC for yourself? Is your mother doing the HSC for you? Remember this HSC is about YOU, if you don't enjoy a subject regardless of how well you're doing and other external factors; and you're finding reasons why you want to drop it; then your solution is clear. This is just the first assessment; now imagine this dragging on for the rest of the year. I think telling your career/year advisor to talk to your mother about this situation; honestly speaking though, scaling isn't the be all or end all; but your result will determine if you are affected by the scaling. This is about what suits you, not what suits your teacher or your mother.

 

[ShadowLighte]

Dude, what do you expect to tell my mum? That it's for my sake and not hers? She'll lecture me til the ends of the earth about how she's doing this for my benefit and go on about all the things she's done in my life. And how am I lying to myself? ._. I know I didn't do it, know I want to drop it but I can't unless I have her permission.

 

[D94]

If you don't drop it, fairly certain you will get an N award for that course. Assuming you are in your HSC year, if you have 10(+) units + CAFS, then you will be 'fine', even if you don't drop it.

There are 3 ways of 'dropping' it: drop it via the standard and proper method; receiving an N award and thus making you ineligible for this course before the HSC exam; or not turning up to the HSC exam for CAFS.

I only recommend dropping it via the standard route - the other two methods may have unknown ramifications.

 

[Squar3root]

if you can live with yourself after and sleep soundly at night then lie about it. Otherwise; isn't there like a admin coordinator at your school that handles subject stuff like swapping, dropping, etc? you should speak to him/her and express your concerns and hopefully s/he will let you drop. whats the worst your mother can do? skin you alive?

EDIT: forge her signature, it really isn't that hard. Did you watch that episode of white collar where Neil shows you how to do it?

 

[iStudent]

forge her signature, it really isn't that hard

that's even worse than just telling her. especially when she finds out in the end.. (trust me nothing goes well if you hide things from people because a lie will build up on lies and you'll end up regretting everything)
seriously what's so hard about telling her, she's your mum!
you might get lectured for a few days, but it will all be over in a few weeks... and it won't drag into months like it has already.

 

[ShadowLighte]

If you don't drop it, fairly certain you will get an N award for that course. Assuming you are in your HSC year, if you have 10(+) units + CAFS, then you will be 'fine', even if you don't drop it.

There are 3 ways of 'dropping' it: drop it via the standard and proper method; receiving an N award and thus making you ineligible for this course before the HSC exam; or not turning up to the HSC exam for CAFS.

I only recommend dropping it via the standard route - the other two methods may have unknown ramifications.

Wouldn't I get a letter sent home in which my mum will have to sign? And yeah, I agree with you which is why this is an issue because otherwise I'd have never even needed to ask my mum.

if you can live with yourself after and sleep soundly at night then lie about it. Otherwise; isn't there like a admin coordinator at your school that handles subject stuff like swapping, dropping, etc? you should speak to him/her and express your concerns and hopefully s/he will let you drop. whats the worst your mother can do? skin you alive?

EDIT: forge her signature, it really isn't that hard. Did you watch that episode of white collar where Neil shows you how to do it?

What do I lie about? I'm sorry I'm not up to scratch with ways other than what is set. Nope, that would be my year advisor. I guess they'd just create a meeting to discuss it. Trust me, I've contemplated forgery but the aftermath probably wouldn't be worth it. I don't think it'd be hard to forge; it's not like people actually check these days but still. She would never trust me with anything.

 

[laura-jayne14]

Okay, so I may come across as bias because I love CAFS - it's my fave!
I have the same issues with my mum too and biology.
I can understand how huge your workload must be as CAFS is very content heavy. Whilst it's a good idea to have an extra few units 'just in case'. It is no use wasting all the energy on something that is boring and irrelevant when you can focus more on your stronger subject. I suggest you don't forge your mum's signature as this will upset her. Can you get someone else in your family to sign it? Maybe talk to her about your choices, she will get over it eventually. Maybe discuss with your year advisor or career advisor on what is best for you and how to manage the critic from your mum.

However, if you do decide to keep it. Work hard, stay positive and get as much help as you can.


After all, it is YOUR decision... Don't rely on parents, friends or teachers... It's not their HSC!
Good luck.

 

[Squar3root]

Wouldn't I get a letter sent home in which my mum will have to sign? And yeah, I agree with you which is why this is an issue because otherwise I'd have never even needed to ask my mum.

What do I lie about? I'm sorry I'm not up to scratch with ways other than what is set. Nope, that would be my year advisor. I guess they'd just create a meeting to discuss it. Trust me, I've contemplated forgery but the aftermath probably wouldn't be worth it. I don't think it'd be hard to forge; it's not like people actually check these days but still. She would never trust me with anything.

when i dropped religion i didn't get a letter, in fact the teacher was thanking me lol because i would have been dragging the other students down. but i guess schools do this differently

that's even worse than just telling her. especially when she finds out in the end.. (trust me nothing goes well if you hide things from people because a lie will build up on lies and you'll end up regretting everything)
seriously what's so hard about telling her, she's your mum!
you might get lectured for a few days, but it will all be over in a few weeks... and it won't drag into months like it has already.

disagree

 

[Squar3root]

yeah maybe just tell your mum/dad/guardian. whats really the worst that can happen? they ground you, take away your phone/internet privileges? if they really would skin you alive then i recommend http://www.kidshelp.com.au/teens/get-help/phone-counselling.php

 

[laura-jayne14]

yeah maybe just tell your mum/dad/guardian. whats really the worst that can happen? they ground you, take away your phone/internet privileges? if they really would skin you alive then i recommend http://www.kidshelp.com.au/teens/get-help/phone-counselling.php

Agreed, This service is very good if you're overwhelmed and need to vent. Someone to help you put things in perspective

 

[Squar3root]

Agreed, This service is very good if you're overwhelmed and need to vent. Someone to help you put things in perspective

i dont know about the service but it was more of a joke, if they do literally threaten your life then call the popo or something

 

[ShadowLighte]

Agreed, This service is very good if you're overwhelmed and need to vent. Someone to help you put things in perspective

Damn, I used to be the one referring people to this site haha, thanks guys c:

Okay, so I may come across as bias because I love CAFS - it's my fave!
I have the same issues with my mum too and biology.
I can understand how huge your workload must be as CAFS is very content heavy. Whilst it's a good idea to have an extra few units 'just in case'. It is no use wasting all the energy on something that is boring and irrelevant when you can focus more on your stronger subject. I suggest you don't forge your mum's signature as this will upset her. Can you get someone else in your family to sign it? Maybe talk to her about your choices, she will get over it eventually. Maybe discuss with your year advisor or career advisor on what is best for you and how to manage the critic from your mum.

However, if you do decide to keep it. Work hard, stay positive and get as much help as you can.


After all, it is YOUR decision... Don't rely on parents, friends or teachers... It's not their HSC!
Good luck.

I used to really like CAFS in prelim though towards the end of the year there was a lot to remember. I think I might've been willing to stay if I hadn't stuffed up my IRP because I chose a crappy topic and didn't know how to research properly + there was essentially nothing to research. I too have biology and that's also content heavy but the scaling is a quite different. I agree, it would be pointless if I'm not willing to put the work in. No fear, I'm not forging her signature. I need a parent's signature and my dad's is already out of the question so no.

Yeah I think I'll end up having to have a discussion with my year advisor to sort things out. Don't worry, I've figured that it's never a good idea to rely on anyone. Good luck to you too.

 

[rumbleroar]

I don't want to force you to rebel against your parents or anything, but you really need to take a stand to her and drop it because it is for yourself AND your education...if she doesn't listen to you, get your teachers to talk to her and explain the situation. I don't think your mum is as unreasonable as what you make her out to be :/

 

[panda15]

If your mum refuses to sign the form to let you drop, just don't turn up to the classes/do any assignments. If your teachers know the story, they will probably just N-award you. You won't be allowed to take the course and your mum can't do anything about it.

 

[ShadowLighte]

I guess if I go to the extent of talking to my teachers and having them contact her about it she'll see how serious I am and am not just dropping it because they're extra units. Thanks for the suggestions, we'll see what happens.

 

[ATAR Achiever]

Hey can I ask a question? Whats the go with getting a letter home and your parents having to sign it? I dropped a course at the start of the year, and as far as I remember I just told the admin person that I wanted to drop, and I haven't done that course since! Hope I actually have dropped the course!!

 

[Greenmarsh]

Follow your heart young skywalker

 

[ShadowLighte]

Hey can I ask a question? Whats the go with getting a letter home and your parents having to sign it? I dropped a course at the start of the year, and as far as I remember I just told the admin person that I wanted to drop, and I haven't done that course since! Hope I actually have dropped the course!!

LOL. Well I suppose every school is has a different way of managing things. In order to drop a subject at my school, firstly you need to get a subject change form from your year advisor where they'll explain what to do and ask you what you want to drop and if you're sure etc. To complete the form you need to provide your student details (i.e. name, roll call, ID etc.) and fill in what subject you wish to drop as well as the line it's in. Then circle whether you want an atar and write how many units you'd have left and what they are. You'll need to get your teacher's signature and then head teacher's signature in that order. After that you need a parent/ guardian signature and provide your own to confirm. Then the principal's signature in which he'll sit you down and give you a lecture about the risks of dropping and ask why etc. Finally, after all that's done, hand it back to your year advisor who'll send it to the BOS and contact you when everything's been finalised. You don't have to do the course once you hand the form in but it doesn't mean you've officially dropped it.

As you can see, mine is a lot more complicated. It may be that teachers want to make sure you're really serious enough about it to go through the lengthy process and you aren't having a mental breakdown and doing something irrational. But even still, there shouldn't be the need for a parent signature; it shouldn't be up to a parent to decide.

In terms of getting a letter home, that's the deal with the incompletion of an assessment task. In that case, I'm pretty sure everyone's the same but a letter's sent home in which you and your parent/ guardian has to sign which acknowledges that you're on your way to an N award and has to be returned ASAP. Two letters home and you're out.