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Best+Worst of Teacher Quotes and Habits (1 Viewer)

idling fire

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mzduxx2006 said:
my teacher says "the better we all do the better we all do" wtf does that mean ?? LOL
Reminds me of:
"The quicker you do it, the quicker it better be done."
Not a teacher quote though, that was my dad. lol
 

yosemite sam

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Food night at school, this stupid girl in my year looks at the Norwegian stall, which has ice cream on offer: "Ice creams Norwegian? Must be cold there...I ain't going to no Norwegia then!"
 

SyCoTiC

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I think my mate's teacher smokes with them. Idiotic but bloody hilarious if you think about it.
 

kkkkaitlyn

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student: 'asks question'
teacher " oh dont worry you only need to know that if you want a band 6"

what a quality biology teacher
 

ccc123

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My year 9 english teacher: "i am good-looking. What tense is that in?"
Student: "Definately past tense."

My modern teacher: "Now. During the holidays you must revise revision for the up and upcoming AP1's"
 

ellen.louise

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my english teacher: "Oh god I need a drink!!!... I mean... sleep! oh come on guys you know what i meant!!!"
"You have lots to do, so go home and get busy!!!... grow up..."

Maths teacher: racing another teacher to get through the topics first, repeating the whole line with 7 different terms of omega again, 3 times, because he made mistakes, and getting of track... "so that's why the irish hate the english..."
 

bizadfar

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We had this teacher and he use to snap so easy. For eg he'd snap at the class "fucken shutup!!" I'd slowly get up to put my rubbish in the bin, and he's shout "siddown ya fuck" He use to peg chalk at the wall. When his in a good mood, his a champion and a funny guy.

This is not really a quote. But there was this blind maths teacher at another school. At 1 class, the students would reshuffle all the desks to surround him. So he couldn't get out.
Sometimes students would sneak up to him while his teaching and pull his pants down. This happened i think in Granville boys.

Yea its cruel, but you have to admit funny as hell. Sometimes they would fill those surrounding desks with porno.
 

bringbackshred

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bizadfar said:
..there was this blind maths teacher at another school. At 1 class, the students would reshuffle all the desks to surround him. So he couldn't get out.
That is one of the most amazing things I have ever heard.
 

goosiegoo

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bizadfar said:
This is not really a quote. But there was this blind maths teacher at another school. At 1 class, the students would reshuffle all the desks to surround him. So he couldn't get out.
Sometimes students would sneak up to him while his teaching and pull his pants down. This happened i think in Granville boys.

Yea its cruel, but you have to admit funny as hell. Sometimes they would fill those surrounding desks with porno.
This makes me sad about humanity...
 

idling fire

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Maths teacher:
Repeats "now" at the beginning of each sentence.
He has an amusing accent too. eg start of lesson telling class to get their thoery books out: "Nooowww take yout your tiddy books."
Another choice quote: "See you be in here getting smart while everyone else just playing around on the ground."

LOTE teacher: "But if you try really, really hard, you will find - it's easy!"
 

bringbackshred

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My Maths teacher feels the need to tell us that everything is literal. "So, literally if we square the hypotenuse..."
 

Legham

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One time, back when i was doing engineering, our teacher was drawing an orange on the board for some reason.. He drew a circle, looked at it for a second, then goes "No wait, i'll draw it from the other side", rubbed out the circle, drew the exact same circle, then just went along with the lesson as though he didnt do anything stupid..

Needless to say, we all cracked up laughing and did nothing else that lesson :D

It was the same teacher that, when driving a minibus down to newcastle for the engineering excursion, hit a van and drove off.. When the owners drove up along side the bus they yelled out the window "You hit my van!". So, he wound up the window and drove off along a side street and lost the van :p
 

tillytilly

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English teacher:

"Okay, now let's get into pairs of three or four and make diagrammatical diagrams."

Also, she calls every Asian student "Cheung" or "Gaya"

Real stupid like.
 

ssglain

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We always have a 10 minute tea break during the after school Ext-1 English class. To our delight, the teacher announced (and this is not the quote): "Oh girls, I have some chocolate cake for you!" Everybody took a piece, but just as we were ready to start munching, she said - to my utmost amusment - "This is my divorce cake, by the way. You know what, you shouldn't eat your piece here. Take it home and sleep with it under your pillow. You will surely dream about the man you are going divorce."
 

tezable

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ancient history teacher...

" i dont know much about this sunbject, so im learing along with you!!"

"i dont have time to teach you this...co u will have to teach yourselves"

mmmm....i love ancient history!
 

Forbidden.

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tezable said:
ancient history teacher...

" i dont know much about this sunbject, so im learing along with you!!"

"i dont have time to teach you this...co u will have to teach yourselves"

mmmm....i love ancient history!
lol n00by teachers haha.
 

andyn

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Sofstar said:
DT teacher sets up a projector so that it goes onto the wall and he starts talking to us. He gets out his white board marker and puts a dot on the 'board' and then someone goes " Ah sir, that's the wall."


Some girls in my class were arguing over which The Veronicas is hotter and bio teacher walks along and goes yeah Jess.

Music captain has fake nails for social and cancelled her piano performance. A music teacher comes along and asks her if it was true and it was, so music teacher goes " Look, real musicians DON'T have nails" *she shows her no nails*
yes that happened to my geo teacher but he drew on the projector screen
 

idling fire

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andyn said:
yes that happened to my geo teacher but he drew on the projector screen
lol
On a related topic, my yr 10 history teacher was writing on the blackboard, and he was trying to get everything to fit on the board, basically contorting the words to reach different spots.
Student: Uh sir, you do realise the point of blackboards is to erase things afterwards.
Teacher: ... oh... yeah... shit...
Though this was the same guy who bashed his head against the board, and whose favourite saying was from The Office: "You know what I'm thinking? ... Will there ever be a boy that can swim faster than a shark?"
 

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