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You naughty old veck. I viddy you'll rather enjoy the goloss with a glass of moloko.

That diet plus 2 x meal replacement shakes.

Three celery sticks. Banana. Green Tea. Grilled fish, green beans, peas and half a potato. Jelly.

30 mins treadmill.

The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, the glare on my screen makes typing here nearly impossible. Lovely...

Yesterday, 10 minute warm up on treadmill. 15 minute fast pace on treadmill. 10 minutes on steps. 2 sets of dumbbell squats (10 reps) 2 sets of dumbbell lunges (10 reps) 2 sets of seated dumbbell shoulder presses (10 reps) 2 sets of hammer curls (10 reps) and finally 2 sets of crunches (10...

What do you think this is? Jokey Mc Joke Town?

Wait. Wait. Wait. Give me your name (or nickname), a secret talent, your closest friends names, best subject at school and favourite band. I will write yours for you. Perhaps a sentence describing your physical appearance may be of benefit too.

Or you could not be a shit cunt, and not...

I literally stepped backwards down into a drain one day.

He really showed you.

High five Jamesy.

Mine read. Inspired by beauty, inspired by cool. A nobody now, a nobody at school. I fell down the drain.

OKAY. Best idea ever. Let's compile a list of fabulous white foods. - Popcorn. - Vanilla Icecream - Rice and pasta! - Scones - Milky coffee - Pancakes and - Potatoes / Potato Salad - Milk bottle lollies - Marshmallow - Sour Cream - Mushrooms